Skills Strategies and Exercises to Treat Personality Problems and Emotion Regulation Problems


Emotions are a normal part of our daily life. We feel exhausted after a hectic routine. We feel sad when we miss a beloved person, and it’s so frustrating for everyone to sit stuck in heavy traffic for hours. It is pretty normal to feel hurt and angry when someone doesn’t meet our expectations. Indeed, such emotions are common, but sometimes people start experiencing more impulsive and unpredictable emotions. This sudden change affects their causal activities and healthy lifestyle significantly. That’s why; it is necessary to take such personality problems and emotion regulation problems seriously.

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Emotion Regulations and Personality Disorder

Emotion regulation disorder makes it challenging for a person to manage his feelings.

Here’s what a person feels with ERD;

  • Obscurity in maintaining a productive relationship
  • Self-destructive behavior
  • Frequent change in mood
  • Over-sensitivity

A person with negative emotions experiences all such behavioral changes and finds it daunting to focus on work.

Significance of Emotion Regulation

Adults are expected to regulate the emotions that are socially acceptable and help them to navigate their lives.  When our emotions start controlling us, they create some complicated issues for us.

Several factors hinder emotion regulation, including our belief about negative emotions, lack of emotion regulation skills, etc.  Usually, distressing situations induce prevailing emotions.

One of the key drawbacks of emotion volatility is that it affects our relationship with others negatively. For instance, our lack of anger management skill can hurt others and causes them to pull away. Certainly, we regret it later, but it’s useless to cry over spilled milk.

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Top 5 Emotion Regulation Skills We All Must Have

Here’s how we can regulate our emotions successfully.

Generate Some Space

We don’t think that ‘I am angry at the moment; we start acting weird. It takes a second to experience a different emotion. So, if we genuinely want to regulate our emotions, we need to work on this ‘Pause’ skill.

Please take a deep breath and think deeply before we take any action. Don’t trigger and take a response immediately as it can hurt you after some time.

Observe Your Feelings

It is equally important to observe what you feel. Try to get more curious about your physical reactions. Spend some time noticing in what part of the body you are noticing sensations. Does any change in emotion upset your stomach? Are you feeling irregular heartbeat or tension in your neck?

Any physical change is also an indication that you are suffering emotionally as well. If you observe some physical changes, it distracts your mind, and your emotional volatility starts growing.

Name What Your Experience

Once you have noticed what you are feeling, the next essential thing is to start naming it. It helps you to control your emotions better. Ask yourself; what’s the exact name of emotion you are experiencing. Is it sorrow, anger, distress, or resentment? Or what? Sometimes, people feel fear and apprehensiveness but try not to share their feelings with others.

It is perfectly alright to experience multiple emotions at the same time. However, it is recommended to dig deeper. For example, if you are angry, what causes this anger? If you are afraid, then what makes you scared? If you can name your emotions, you can share them with others.

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Accept Your Emotions

As mentioned earlier, it is agreeable to accept what you feel.  Please don’t blame yourself for an angry or frustrated mood; try to embrace it. Try to give importance and compassion to yourself. You deserve all love and care. Experiencing different emotions and accepting them is a real victory, and you should start practicing it now.

Practice Mindfulness

If you genuinely want to ‘Live in the moment, ‘ you have to start practicing mindfulness by focusing on what you feel. Don’t judge yourself; just observe what you think.

These skills are helpful to keep you calm and avoid undesired negative emotions.

So, start practicing them now and see the significant change in your personality.

Practical Strategies to Regulate Your Emotions

Work on these strategies to regulate your emotions most finely.

Figure-Out and Mitigate Triggers

You don’t need to avoid negative emotions. However, try to avoid putting yourself in a situation that triggers negative emotions. Try to look for factors that are present when you experience intense emotions. You have to be honest and curious here. Usually, people experience negative emotions when they feel small or insecure.

Once you found-out such triggers, you can better look for ways to mitigate them.

Tune in Physical Symptoms

Pay heed to everything you experience, including sadness, hunger, or tiredness. Such factors worsen and interrupt your emotions firmly. Once you have figured out your key issues (including starvation, fatigue), you can easily divert emotional response.

Encourage Positive Discussion

Overwhelming emotions make us feel negative every time. Usually, we start feeling pity for every minor inconvenience. You shouldn’t do this; try to feel empathy for you to overcome negative emotions with the positive ones. This way, you start feeling better and optimistic.

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Regulate Your Emotions with Professional Help

Working on the skills mentioned above and strategies can help you in regulating your negative mood and emotions. It is also recommended to seek professional help for better implementation of skills and strategies.